In these strange times, many of us lack contact with family and friends.
The desire to return to the life to which we are accustomed is great and the longing for freedom to travel is growing.
It becomes more and more difficult to maintain confidence and a positive attitude towards life from within oneself.
Questions, fears, worries send one on an inward journey in an unusual way.
"A little help couldn't hurt!", my inner voice said to me meekly at some point....
I clearly felt that the pandemic was merely the straw that broke the camel's back.
For what felt like an eternity, the joy of living had been curbed and mixed into a murky brew of fighting spirit, everyday bravado, fear, emptiness of feeling and sadness.
The word "joie de vivre" had traded its place with "holding on while standing still."
I smoked almost a pack of cigarettes every day, was grateful when I came home from work in the evening exhausted, and at 20.00h I stared at the TV, which gave me the next dose of daytime news.
Often I fell asleep on the sofa at 20.05h.
I was increasingly afraid of the weekends - when the oppressive paralysis took its place on the couch between me and my boyfriend and could not be driven away with anything.
Neither for him, nor for me, it was blissful between us, but gloomy, tons heavy, uninspired - and it didn't matter if we were really sitting on the couch, shopping, or taking a walk.
I couldn't and wouldn't go on like this, and I didn't know how to do myself or my partner justice.
I was miles away from the person I should and wanted to be deep down.
I was far from feeling anything at all except sadness, self-doubt and inner turmoil.
Many sleepless nights lay behind me.
Two weeks off work lay ahead of me and I wanted to use this time for myself. I asked for time off from the relationship - despite all the fear of loss!
This was the time when I sought contact with Ilona.
In our first telephone conversation Ilona took a lot of time. Quickly I was in a familiar conversation with her, in which I not only told her about myself, but also learned a lot from her.
Impressive was also a "little taste" of her work, which made my hand tingle until my fingers started to hover.
Finally, we made a first "real" appointment for the next day. Already after I had hung up the phone, joy arose in me.
A little later I went to bed and slept deeply for the first time in a long time.
The following day I felt skepticism. What is there to Ilona's work?
The world of healers and miracles, tarot card artists and psychics, esoteric and meditation groups, hope, faith and powerlessness, prayers to higher powers -
all this had attracted me again and again in the course of decades. It had brought me to this point and no further!
Only one realization has rooted itself deeply in me: I myself am my destiny.
What prevented me from finally rushing forward with this insight and shaping my life according to my ideas?
How do I muster the strength to change?
Where should my journey lead?
With the call to Ilona I had booked a "journey to myself".
Inside I was jumping with anticipation - my trust in Ilona as a good "guide" was great and I was not disappointed!
With great care and deep knowledge of human nature she felt together with me into my inner self and brought to light many points that hindered me in my own personality development.
On three consecutive days we discussed MY wishes, hopes, dreams, goals and she explained to me conclusively the connection between energy and thought patterns.
I was deeply impressed by Ilona's loving work. She uses her skills in a targeted way to provide one with strength and energy.
You can feel how this energy spreads tingling in the body and brings completely new, sometimes surprising tones in one to sound and vibrate.
After the first day, I suddenly had little desire to smoke - this was a "by-product", so to speak, because I had mentioned in passing that I would basically like to stop smoking,
but I wasn't ready for it. For years I had dreamed that I would like to switch to e-cigarettes, or become a casual smoker. Now I haven't bought any cigarettes for more than a week.
Ilona laughed heartily with me on the second day when I asked if I had to stop smoking altogether now. "You decide for yourself," she answered me, without any pressure or imposed worldview.
That it would be healthier, knows nowadays anyway every child 😉
I experienced many moments during the work with Ilona when I could let go of old outdated patterns and pains. Space has become free to let my own views and ideas grow there.
A great calmness spreads within me and the confidence to grow at my own pace. The inner tension that had been in me for years is slowly giving way. Confidence in my own potential grows.
How many doubts about myself had lain dormant in me! It simply felt infinitely good to be accompanied and to feel how Ilona provides her positive power and knowledge to break through my own hurdles.
Without this push from Ilona I would not have made it.
My journey has begun and I am happy to be on the road (again)!
There are those precious moments when I feel myself clearly, look at myself in the mirror and think: Yes, I love this girl!
It is again pulse to feel, when I feel for the heartbeat of my lightness and my creative vein.
I dream big and colorful again at night - only the boundlessness that Ilona recommended to me is still arguing a bit with humility and modesty.
But: Finally - after years I sat again at my desk in front of my started novel. The next pages are written, hurray!
My piano sounds completely different when I sit in front of it now and don't just try to play notes from the sheet, but close my eyes and let the tones flow from my fingers.
I know again: In my life my love should blossom in a partnership, in which closeness, passion, soul mateship and joy lead to a common development.
We had arrived at a standstill. We maintained a status quo out of fear of loss and to be safe from loneliness.
His view of things looked different from mine - and I no longer wanted to persevere in the balancing act between our different personalities.
Whether we have a future together will become clear when each first creates a development process for himself.
On Good Friday I was invited to a friend's house - we see each other every week. She saw me and immediately told me that my face looks smoother, more refreshed and relaxed than it has in ages.
No wonder, I have gained much more inner serenity, sleep better and look forward to my day in the morning. I get over myself much more easily to exercise every day.
I also turn on "angel music" and dance in my living room afterwards. I have never been good at meditating cross-legged - I discovered my own movements with Ilona.
And very important: My eternal carousel of thoughts has stopped spinning. I am once again the master of my thoughts and thus I have gained a great deal of inner freedom to direct and shape my life myself.
Many years ago a "friend" once said to me: "If you have problems, don't make any".
I felt really let down by these words. They neither encouraged me nor helped me.
Rather, I felt like a failure who could not cope with her problems....
I say to everyone who reads these lines: "If you have sorrows and worries, then get help from Ilona, so that you get the strength it takes to leave the problems behind you and blossom".
Everyone deserves to take a helping hand.
Thank you Ilona.
You said that it is your heart's desire to use your abilities and gifts for people so that they can live a happy life.
I believe you without reservation and I wish you that all the happiness you send out comes back to you!